Three Diapers + Spilled Breast Milk = Daddy Surrenders

Yes, you read the title correctly. Daddy did not have a good night. Kiana hasn't been pooping for the past couple of days which had caused me to be a little worried. As some of you may not know, I don't handle dirty diapers very well. I have to pull my shirt over my nose. Well anyways, back to the "not pooping for two days" got me concerned because eventually what goes in must come out and if it's in there a long time we could be headed for a blowout diaper. Thank goodness that did not happen. However, before I bottle fed Kiana, I changed one very poopy diaper. Once that was done with, I got all comfortable and was just about to bottle feed Kiana and she pooped in her diaper. I had to change her right away before I passed out. Yes, it was that bad especially since it was stuck in her for two days. Once the second diaper was changed I setup to bottle feed her again. Kiana sucked down 1oz of breast milk and then I decided to burp her. I put her back on my lap and before I started to feed her I was getting all of the air out of the plastic liner in the bottle. To educate those who may not know, this is a plastic baby bottle with a drop-in plastic liner. Once the breast milk or baby formula is poured into the plastic liner, you must squeeze the plastic liner to get the air out. Well, I squeezed a little too hard and too much and had about 2oz of breast milk explode on me. Not fun. At this point, Heather is laughing too hard and can't get up right away to help me. While this is all going on, what does Kiana decide to do? Yes, you guessed it. She poops again. At this point, I am on diaper number three with spilled breast milk all over my right hand, pants, and a surrender flag in my left hand.